The Funeral

After our best chicken Jenny's death, Vince helped Marina feel better by talking about the funeral. Falcom wanted to dig a big hole, but we still have 2 feet of snow at our house. Vince wanted to take her to the dump, but with a great chicken like that, lets just say that he knew better than to mention it out loud. He also hesitated with the idea of leaving her under a tree in the woods somewhere for fear that what ever creature might stumble upon her might decide they really enjoy the taste of chicken. And so, instead he had the idea to have a cremation for Jenny. That really appealed to Marina's punk rock heart.

Too bad he was leaving town on the day that he came up with that great idea.

All the omens of the day seemed auspicious. We saw an eagle retrieving hay from a field for it's nest. We saw these moose brothers strolling around town.
We spent a lot of good time at Priscilla's until it was time to go see Horton Hears a Who.

When we got home we knew that it was time to get on with the funeral. DeeJay built us a fire. Marina, Falcom and DeeJay decorated the casket. I educated the children about different cultures and how this is a common practice in other parts of the world. The kids said a touching prayer for her and we talked about impermanence.

Unfortunately, the wood was wet. The area that we were making the fire on was snow and it quickly turned to muck. The casket burned. The wood fell down upon the heap. The kids started wandering around.

DeeJay and I looked into the fire and out poked a charred chicken foot. I quickly shoved it back into the fire before anyone could see it. DeeJay and I fanned that fire for what seemed to be an hour. DeeJay broke into the gasoline and was trying to entice it into burning really hot. I kept fanning. Falcom was off rolling down the hill into the snow (thank God!) and Marina was fighting with us to get to play in the fire: 'can I poke it?', 'can we roast marshmallows', 'can I put some gasoline on it myself?'

It was at this point DeeJay and I walked around the fire trying to get away from the smoke and saw poking out was the completely unburned barely singed feathers of our beloved chicken. At this point, Marina had traipsed off to play with Falcom and DeeJay looked at me and in his beautiful Island accent says;

"Oh My God! Mom! Jenny has turned into totally burned nasty dongus chicken with the head still on and guts hanging out! What are we going to do!?"(Dongus is an island word which refers to a type of BBQ style)

It was at this point that I started laughing my head off. This experience had crossed the line to where it could not get worse. My laughter at this disgusting situation drew Marina immediately over to see. DeeJay moved a piece of wood over to cover the part with the feathers still showing, but I tried to help and made a leg bone hang out of the partially cooked flesh.

DeeJay looked at me horrified but laughing. I decided I'd better pull out all the stops and said, "Fal, why don't you go in and watch a movie! Take your sister with you!" Falcom was on that, but Marina wanted to help put out the fire. She made a snowball and threw it into the now barely burning embers and said, "I see her in there still."

"No you don't hon, that is just the wood." She looked at me unconvinced.

Fortunately by this time, DeeJay had poured another dose of gasoline onto the fire and the head was now gone.

"Yea Marina it's just wood. Go with Falcom and watch." They went into the house and DeeJay and I started laughing. He was wiping tears when he ran to get the shovel. I got a bucket of snow and we scooped the charred chicken and I drove it to the dump, getting there right before closing time.

You know, that chicken did not even melt the snow in the bucket. I unceremoniously evacuated her into the dumpster.

Good-bye Jenny, We've Loved You!